How can you regain confidence in speaking when you are shy?


The purpose of this article is to help people who feel shy to be more confident.

Above all, it is a question of understanding what shyness is. Each person is more or less shy depending on the area or situation in which they find themselves at a given moment T.

overcoming shyness

One positions oneself on a scale according to one's own gaze or the gaze of others. My goal is to give you the keys to feel more fulfilled, more confident and of course to have better self-esteem. In this way, you will be able to get rid of your shyness to be either better at communicating or better at speaking.

Indeed, when you feel shy, it can be difficult to make decisions, be bold, or be confident in public. And generally speaking, this can result in poor interpersonal comfort in everyday life. These are all essential qualities to be a good speaker.

But don't worry, it's something you have to work on every day! So I'm going to give you 4 tips to be confident despite your shyness.

1. Take stock of oneself to assess one's shyness

Some people will be shy because they have had a bad experience in one area of their life. Others will be afraid to try something new. Some are afraid of the judgment of others and therefore no longer dare to perform certain actions. The point is really to ask yourself why you are shy and lack self-esteem.

Once you've identified what kind of shy person you are, just work on that axis. It is important to target the source of your shyness as much as possible in order to act in-depth on what affects you personally. The more you "self-analyze" yourself, the more you will be able to take concrete action.

2. Managing to be shy and effective when speaking

Are you orally shy in front of an audience? And you find it difficult to manage your stress in public? Then it is important to be transparent with your audience. So if you are shy and lack confidence, just say so.

Before you begin, you can let your audience know that you have done a lot of work on the topic you are going to present, but that speaking in front of several people does not make you feel comfortable.

It happens to many people and your audience will understand you. They will be empathetic and even impressed that you are facing your fears. Your audience may even applaud you and congratulate you on gaining self-confidence when you are shy.

This has a doubly positive effect; because if people recognize your work and congratulate you, your ego and self-esteem will be boosted. The more you speak in public, the more self-confidence you will have from the feedback of others.

This advice of transparency can also be applied in several areas of your daily life. If you are shy with people you don't know, you can simply warn them of this and they will be understanding with you.

3. Be inspired by a confident and comfortable person

Whether it is in your entourage, in the movies, on television, there are many people who have a strong sense of self-confidence. So to have confidence in yourself, even when you are shy, you just need to draw inspiration from these people. You can ask yourself what they would do in this or that situation.

Several behaviors are characteristic of confident people. You need to analyze their behavior and adopt it.

  • What posture do confident people have? Are they curled up or do they adopt a charismatic stance?
  • What tone of voice do they have? Are they engaged in what they are saying or do they speak in a weak, monotonous voice?
  • In what situation do they speak?
  • Do charismatic people play sports?
  • Do they have goals or dreams?
  • Are these people well organized?

It is all these questions that you must ask yourself when observing people you trust. If charismatic men have a deep voice, then find a solution to have a deeper voice.  

4. Acting rather than waiting in your shyness

Like everything else, self-confidence has to be worked on. By remaining passive, it is impossible to achieve real results. you have to do it gradually. Your action can manifest itself by simply speaking out in public.

Even if your speech doesn't persuade your audience directly, it's the first step. Afterward, you can take other actions to be more charismatic and convince your audience. You need to take progressive but concrete actions. This is also what some people call the small steps method, and quite honestly, I can only recommend it to you. Even though your results will come gradually, one thing you can be sure of is that they will be there, and in numbers, after a certain amount of time.

BONUS: Find a field or develop your confidence

If you are a shy person, and I know what I'm talking about because I used to be, you probably feel a blockage in many areas of your life: communication, sports, emotions, work... In fact, this is normal, because low self-esteem prevents you from developing your confidence in each of these areas.

This is why I recommend that you find a field in which you will seek to develop yourself 200%. For my part, it was in sports and more particularly in fitness.

Yes, it was a field of activity in which I was alone, and yet, seeing myself evolve in this activity and knowing more and more about my skills and my limits, allowed me to have better self-esteem afterward.

And it is with this better esteem that you will then be able to blossom a little more in communication, human relations, in your job, and in all the other areas that are close to your heart.

So to be more confident, start gradually, analyze your shyness, and get inspiration from people who are full of confidence. These small gestures will help you feel more comfortable. And if you wish to go further, I invite you to take a free complete online course on relational ease and communication.

This free online course is available here: take the 1-hour online course. You will learn how to overcome your fear of speaking, how to become more charismatic, and how to present effectively in front of an audience.

Thank you for reading this article, I hope it has inspired you and helped you overcome your shyness by developing your self-esteem and confidence.